Sistertech’s Memo to Steve Jobs: Confession is good for the soul

Frank, one of our SWAT (Spirituality While Alive Taskforce) members, came in to watch Steve’s conference with me.

“This isn’t pretty,” Frank said.

“I know,” I sighed. “I know. I thought he’d do something more than this.”

Frank got up. “Aren’t you going to stay for the whole thing?” I asked.

“Nope. I’ve got to fly down to Tokyo.”

It was then that I understood what humans meant when they said “misery loves company”. I sure could have used another angel to lean on right then.

“Sistertech,” Frank said, “you tried your best. Anyway, you know what Tina in the Conversions Department is always saying.”

“What’s that?”

Frank laughed and said, “You can lead a horse to water, but you sure can’t make him drink!”

“That’s not funny Frank!”

“Well, it’s the truth, isn’t it? And the truth shall set you free. Gotta go.”

Frank flew off, leaving me alone staring into the monitor.

Obviously my session with Steve’s direct reports did not trickle up to Steve himself. His mea culpa, or rather, his semi mea culpa was dispositive on that question.

“Well, everybody else’s smart phones have antenna problems. Our phones are no different.”

Now is that any way to apologize? It is nothing more than the proverbial “Well, everybody’s doing it” excuse. “All the other teams in the league are doing it. What’s the big deal? We’re just doing it, too.” Has no one told this man that simply because everybody else’s smart phone antennas have this vulnerability, that it’s not such a big deal if Apple’s has it, too?

No, it was now high time for repentance and a sincere reformation of the brand. Since Steve basically is the brand, it’s up to him to spill the real beans and come clean. I would be more than happy to hear Steve’s confession. In fact, just about any iPhone 4 owner would be glad to do hear it. If you’re reading this Steve, don’t be nervous. In fact, why not take a look at how this confession thing works. Trust me. Confession will be good for your soul and your shareholders.